The Lotus Eater..

Good morning fellas..good morning Malaysia..

____________________ I am LOST.

***This blog is ain't about things like this..but what should I do, where should I scream this thing out..when can I actually feel peace in my heart..
Am I being the old me again..?
OVER THINKING ?

secondly, Am I a bad person..?
Can I do the right thing without hurting..Is it okay to say good bye ? Where can I release this tense..its eating me everyday and I am not happy..to bear this guilt and to live in it every day..trying to make everything okay but it torn me into pieces every time I try..

Did I care too much that I loose the one I already hold on too..or I am just being me, releasing the feeling tat buried deep down for such a long time..or I am just pretending that everything gonna be just fine at the end of this drama..who am I dealing with ?

ME ?

eventually its all up to me..and I wonder why..can I pick my self..?
Can I choose my own self ? I have a good life, God loves me..He bless me with a lot of good things and such a wonderful family..so why don't I walk the road all by my self..I did it once I surely can do it again..* but I can't..I made a promise..

     What should I do to make my self happy..what can I do...to create a situation that everyone will okay with it..sacrifice ?..I am living in my dream that I forgot I've crossed too much lines. now I'm in trouble and it looks..funny.* I leave this things to you God :) You enhance my life every time I hit the bottom. Now, I realised that I don't have to be afraid..because what ever it is that waiting me in the future..I know You will lead me to the best.

**hoho..I felt so much better now..thank you blog, thank you mr. brain..thank You Holy Spirit. :) You just make my day.

sincerely,
miss grace